FEMA Assessment of Salem's Katrina Team

Government Assessment of Individual Team Members:

To the membership of Salem First Presbyterian Church, here is the "official" FEMA report card on your Hurricane Katrina team members

Wes - absolute worst sweet cheese grits in history, don't know sugar frum salt but the boy's learning. A real Bubba wanna-be.
Bubba-San David - best volunteer in recorded history, absolutely no improvement needed. A knight in flannel. Consider removing tobacco before sleeping.
Mary - most fun person to tease & cuts a ham into the smallest pieces possible!
Wayne - can skillfully fix anything but finds Mexican restaurants only with great difficulty and several snap no-notice u-turns. Cruises US90 for fun on way to Lowe's every morning, right at devotions time!
Rick - fastest electrical repairs in history and somehow snores even more than David. A knight with a tool belt instead of a sword.
Morella - best dang First Sergeant Gautier Pres ever saw! Being recruited by Navy's Blue Angels! Writes her name on work apron to remember who she is.
Karen - best smiles; lighted up the entire Gulf so much she could power Gautier with her smiles. We'll take two of her!
Ed - quietest & most skillful disaster repair expert on the Gulf Coast! Laughs at most jokes - providing his hearing aids are in!
Joan - world-famous organist, hangs wallboard pretty good, can park a 40,000 LB RV anywhere and best friend Wes ever had
Dixie - a good dog. The highest praise possible. The best friend a person can have in Washington. Ask FEMA's Michael Brown!

Send this or any other Salem team back. They're dang good!

Love and hugs,

FEMA

(you know our motto - "The trailer will be there in the morning. We promise!")